Hello, friends.

Please forgive my recent absence from the blogging world. Life got a little crazy, and despite a million thoughts going through my head, I wasn’t sure how to write about any of them.

By the time you read this, I’ll be in Colorado, but at the moment, I’m somewhere over the Atlantic Ocean (or perhaps Canada). I’m still waiting for word on whether I’ll be allowed to return to Ireland in the near future, and my time on the north coast has come to an end for the moment. I am flying back to the States for what I hope is a short visit.

The past two weeks have been filled with the excitement of seeing my family (who will all be together for the first time in nearly three and half years), looking forward to Taco Bell and biscuits and gravy (don’t worry Ireland and UK friends, it’s not what it sounds like to you), and making plans to connect with people I haven’t seen in years. They’ve also been filled with the emotions of leaving home without knowing if or when I’ll be back, saying goodbye to friends who feel like family, and wondering and praying about what the future might hold.

Despite the unknowns, I am at peace. I know the things God has spoken, and I know that He will work all things for His glory and my good. In a season that has felt so chaotic and full of uncertainty, I have discovered a new level of trust and surrender. There are decisions to be made that affect my future, but I have no control over what will be decided. I have done what I can do, and now I have to leave the outcome in God’s hands.

For someone who likes to plan and then make a back-up plan, this season of waiting to see God’s plans unfold without being able to “help” seems like it should be torture. It has certainly had its moments, but surprisingly, I have found a freedom in it.

When I left my little flat two and half months ago, I joked about going on holiday for a couple of weeks. I found that I needed rest far more than I realized, and yet, for the first few weeks my mind and heart struggled to find the rest that my body was enjoying. However, as I have learned to loosen my grip on my plans and trust in Him at deeper levels than ever before, I have discovered a deep rest in the midst of chaos.

I don’t know what the next weeks and months will bring. In reality, none of us do. I can make a fairly confident guess that good news and hard news will both visit each of us in the days to come. Long awaited answers to prayer may come, or it may be that the waiting and praying continues. Whatever comes, though, I am learning to say, “It is well with me.”